Ribbon-Laced Corset Top: Snatched Waist, Instant Glam.
Alright, buckle up buttercup because this ain't your grandma's toaster. This is… [imagine a dramatic pause]… THE CHRONOSCRAMBLER 5000. We're talking flavor so intense, it'll bend spacetime. This isn't just breakfast it's a goddamn experience. Get ready to taste the future… or maybe the past… it's all a blur when you're rockin' with the Chronoscrambler. Features include… well, let's just say it makes eggs taste like freedom and bacon sing the blues. Buy now and you'll also receive a complimentary dimension-hopping warranty (void where prohibited by interdimensional law). Don't be a square.
$16.00
$32.00